You THOUGHT 2008 was the year of the gentleman, which it is if you’re Ne-Yo. And it’s also the year of the election, if you hadn’t heard about that rarely-discussed little news nug. And it’s the 25th anniversary of Cabbage Patch Kids — those lovable little dolls born of an otherwise-reviled veggie, with a sparkle in their eyes, and a John Hancock on their bums. The ones that caused ‘bows-throwin’ frenzies at toy stores across the country, if you’re old enough to remember cray-cray moms getting clocked in the grill during Cabbage Patch stampedes.
And while it’s been 25 years since the first Cabbage Patch Kiddie sprouted, it’s also been four years since Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey (at that point still a couple) got the CPK treatment and were forever immortalized, for better or for worse, in the Celebrity CPK collection.
It’s also been almost TEN years since Nick and Jess made sweet, sweet musical love in the woods, on a carousel, and in a diner in their “Where You Are” video, which you totally forgot about until now, didn’t you?
Oh yeah, my source at Cabbage Patch HQ (who has an actual cabbage for a head), tells me that some new celeb Cabbage Patch Kids are in the works. Perhaps they’re planting the seed for your very own little squeezable Tony Romo? Or a non-threatening Katy Perry doll? Also, is it unhealthy that I kinda miss the Chicken Of the Sea-era Jess and Nick? It is, isn’t it?